All is Well life is hell
Welcome To The End of The Rainbow
It might not be what you expected
Things aren’t always what they appear.
FTW DTK Sunset Park Style
Just so you know, we’re tired of it all
Once more unto the breach
We’re not here to sell you anything… yet.. but read on
no online store no selling products. Our platform integrates useless soul deadening information with some useful crap here and there..
24/7 Access
This site is always available
Analytics and Reporting
Stay on top of your life’s poor performance with real-time analytics.
Become CEO and declare moral bankruptcy for your own world
Make sure your world is yours.
Having a soul isn’t everything, so why keep it intact
Questionable Testimonial:
“I appreciated the 24/7 nausea and dry heaves!”
Ken R
CEO, FTW Inc.
Top Features
✓ SEO Optimization
✓ Drag and Drop Interface
✓ Customizable Templates
Simple for everyone.
Our expert team ensures elegant, functional and visually pleasing stuff.. or not.
Still Alive?
Ummm plan
$12
/mo
✓
Includes:
✓
Apathy
✓
0 collaborators
✓
no support
Freelancer
Everything you need to start your freefall to the end of the rainbow
$29
/mo
✓
Includes:
✓
Apathy
✓
0 collaborators
✓
No support
✓
1,000 requests
Startup
Everything you need to go broke
$59
/mo
✓
Includes:
✓
Extreme Apathy
✓
0 collaborators
✓
No support
✓
5,000 requests
✓
Ridicule in your blog
Ultimate
Everything you need to completely collapse
$99
/mo
✓
Includes:
✓
Unlimited Apathy
✓
3 collaborators
✓
No support
✓
15,000 requests
✓ Unlimited Social Media Ridicule as well as Scorn
What our customers say
★★★★★
I’ve never been so unhappy!
My friends deny that they know me.
Sarah Johnson
Owner, Sarah’s Artisanal Bakery
Frequently Asked Questions
Simply reach out to our team, providing us with your vision, and we will swiftly develop a plan that will transform your dreams into a pile of never-ending shit.
Is it possible to adjust my life downward?
Absolutely, as long as you provide us with a minimum of 45 days’ notice, you can adjust your downward spiral up to two times without any additional charges.
Tell me more about your cancellation policy.
Any traumatic life events rescheduled within 45 days of the original date will require full payment for perishable items, plus any cash you have on hand. However, we always strive to collaborate with you.
How does the billing process work?
We’ll come to your home or business with 2 very large persons who haven’t eaten and have a bad attitude to boot!
What is the process for managing guest invites?
We don’t actually have that so fuck off.
Can I receive a receipt for my order?
huh?
Need further assistance?
Need help finding the answers you need? Let’s have a conversation.
Build a New Life!
✓ Easy to use
✓ Beautifully designed patterns